Time For A Change
As the Northern Hemisphere moves deeper into the heart of Winter and the Southern Hemisphere dances into the arms of Summer, it is a good time to take stock of what is going on in our inner landscape.
Are there questions you have been wrestling with?
Are there relationships that need to be looked over?
Are there stories you live by that maybe need to be re-imagined?
How is your inner landscape?
If any of these questions resonate with you, it may be time for some soul searching.
Where I am in the Northern Hemisphere, the days are short and the nights are cold. Sunshine is a precious commodity that is delivered only about once a week. It is the time of year when we want to take stock of our circumstances.
Answer the following statements:
- I was happiest this year when _______________________________.
- I was unhappiest this year when _____________________________.
- If I could do ________________________ over again, I would.
- If I could change _____________________, I would.
- I am at my best when ____________________________.
#1 – What made you the happiest this year? What circumstances, people, places,and/or things brought you feelings of peace, satisfaction or joy? According to research, the state of happiness lowers our stress levels and is great for our heart as it reduces stress which reduces risks of cardiovascular disease.
#2 – What made you unhappiest this year? What circumstances, people, places, and/or things brought feelings of sadness, anger or loneliness? As research tells us, happiness is wonderful and unhappiness, not so much. Stress brings premature aging, lack of sleep, low libido and a host of others problems. Being unhappy may the most stressful state of all.
#3 – What do you regret this year? Oftentimes, there are actions we have taken that we wish we did not take; things we said that we would like to take back. It is important to acknowledge these moments as the year closes. Many people want to gloss over or ignore moments they regret but this is not healthy. Regret can lead to a state of unhappiness if left unattended. Also, how can we plot a clear path to a happier future if we can’t acknowledge and forgive our past behaviors?
#4 – Here’s is where plans for change begin. What is the one thing you want to change about yourself, your relationships or your environment? This is not an outward focused question but a chance to take real inventory. Who are you? Who are you striving to be? Is there something standing between the two that you want to get rid of? There is nothing more liberating than moving past an obstacle that keeps you from being the person you want to be.
#5 – What are you like when you are at your best? What do you feel like? What is your state of mind? What is your state of heart? Think back to a time, place or relationship where you felt truly in your zone. Where you were living the best version of yourself and life was exactly the way you wanted it to be. If that feeling is not happening for you most of the time then there is something wrong with the life you are living. We all have ups and downs but the truth is we are here to live the best version of our Unique Self not a pale imitation that leaves of unhappy.
As you reflect on the answers that rise up, be on the lookout for that small voice that is asking for more than just a moment of reflection. It is asking for healing.
This time of year new resolutions are made, new promises are made, new plans are made, new regimes are implemented, etc. The reality is 90% of this newness will wear off by February and frustration and unhappiness will return stronger than before. This is because we, generally, make big, life-altering decisions to change at the beginning of a new year when what we really should be making are small, life-altering steps to heal.
A Path Towards Healing
One of the profound truths of human existence is that we are always looking for the easy answer to a complex problem.
Unhappy with our weight? Join a gym.
Dissatisfied with our job? Find a new one.
Unhappy in our relationship? Move to the next.
All of these are viable options but only if we have done the hard work of discovering WHO we really are and WHAT we really want. Otherwise, the gym membership lapses, the new job becomes just as frustrating as the old one, and the new relationship starts to look, suspiciously, like the one we left.
The common denominator? You.
In order to break the pattern, we have to know what the pattern is. In order to attain the change we seek, we have to know what is not working. In order to shift our state, we have to determine what state keeps us where we are.
The new year offers the opportunity to chart a new path. One, life-altering step at a time.
Change Your Story, Change Your Life: 6 Weeks to a New You
Change Your Story, Change Your Life is a 6 week program designed to help you pinpoint the blocks in your life script that are preventing the relationships and the life you want.
For more information please contact us at firstname.lastname@example.org